As Louisa Would Say

Uh Oh... Alcena Gets All Existential and Stuff...

Wed, 08 Feb 2012 18:02:26 -0700

Ch-Ch-Ch-Chaaaannnggessss.... Oooo how scary change can be... and liberating... and terrifying... and freakin' awesome!!! When I decided to scrap Louisa's menu and start fresh it came out of a realization that we had no idea who we were. We weren't focused, had no direction and were going no where. Our goals and values weren't clear. It was like we were on a ship with no captain, an elevator with no operator, an expedition with no guide, a hot air balloon with no controls... So I did what any self respecting business owner would do... I freaked out. I threw some stuff, yelled, screamed and then, finally, focused and embarked on some introspection. You know, took a little look under our hood... And that's when I saw it... The problem. The real issue. It wasn't with Louisa's it was me. I opened the hood and there I was staring back at me. "Helloooo, remember me?" Crap...

"What do I want Louisa's to be?" became "What do I want to be?"

"Who is Louisa's Cafe?" became "Who am I?"

"What the f**k am I doing this for?!?"

Holy shit this was getting very existential and frankly, really annoying... All this what am I doing and why and how and OMG is this going to work talk was scaring the crap out of me. But it had to be done. When shits not going your way and you're lost in the abyss the only place you can go is in. Its the only real place that's constant. If it's not right at the core then its not right anywhere. If there is no direction, no road, then you're not going anywhere. You're just treading water in the pond waiting and no one else can throw you a life ring. See, you can survive treading water but you're not going to get anywhere. You'll just stay there and eventually, well, you'll drown. Eeek...

Anyway... the results are still coming in. Louisa's is changing her menu to reflect who she really is. So come see us as we transform. And don't freak out ok? My intentions are best and honorable. And who knows? Maybe you'll just love it!

As for me? Well, I'm still working on it. Just writing this blog is making me tired of myself already... What I do know is the following:

I want to be the proprietress of a successful Louisa's
I want to be an exceptional friend, mother and wife
I want a pony...just kidding...
I want happiness and love everyday in my life and my work

Not too shabby for a few months work... I wonder what will happen next...

All Action Until The End of The World...

Fri, 06 Jan 2012 23:06:04 -0700

Finally! 2012 has arrived. After a borderline disasterous end to 2011 (multiple illnesses, break ins, fraud and hives in December alone...) I welcome 2012 with open arms!!!

So forget what I said about making myself a cook. I did 3 recipes and then life happened. Blah blah we know how that goes... I just didn't follow thru on it. I apologize immensely to myself and anyone else that had been supportive of me and that project. Sometimes life just gets too big and in the way of the stuff you really wanna do...

But its a new bright and shiny year... The year of The Dragon... My year. This year belongs to me. I am taking back what's mine.

My freedom...

My voice...

My life...

This year is the year I leave all my stupid fears to rot under a burned out car on the side of 99 Highway.

This is the year I bring myself back from the mysterious place I disappeared to.

This is the year I do whatever I want with my business, myself and my future.

My head is out of the sand. My eyes are open and my feet are on the ground and ready to push me forward. This is the year I make it all happen. It's all action all the time... Until the end of the world...

Xoxo

Alcena

The Making of a Cook...ME!

Fri, 16 Dec 2011 14:03:56 -0700

So… Here is a confession… I don’t really know how to cook. Ok, thats an exaggeration but not by much. I didn’t go to culinary school and I didn’t apprentice with a great chef. Or a mediocre chef. Or any chef of any kind. I worked in a little cafe when I was 18 cooking brunch but thats it. And now, here I am, the “chef” in my own restaurant. The story is longer and more complicated than that but when you strip it down those are the basics.

I can cook what I can very well and I have never shied away from a recipe. I’ve made it thru the last year by reading and consulting with other chefs, friends and staff… But I still need more… I crave more knowledge. Its this horrible itch that wakes me up at night and gives me anxiety… What am I missing? What don’t I know? What could I be making if I hadn’t approached my career backwards? Aaaaah! ##more##

Since taking over the kitchen at Louisa’s I have tried to take some cooking classes and even looked into going to culinary school. Turns out I don’t have the time. I have two restaurants to run and a little girl to spend time with. There really are only 24 hours in a day and mine are filled. So what’s an accidental chef to do?

I realized that the only way to learn more would be to be more disciplined. I need to take my pursuit of knowledge of cooking to another level. And since that level can’t be culinary school or apprenticeship I am left to my own devices. My own brain, my own hands, my own pursuit of creativity and the tools to create. I am starting with a challenge that I stole from a movie…

I am cooking my way thru “The New Making of a Cook” by Madeleine Kamman. Ms. Kamman is commonly referred to as the “French Julia Child.” She was a methodical chef. Her book is extremely detailed with the whys and hows of cooking everything and often reads like a science class text book. There are over 700 recipes and 1200 pages. I will select 3 – 5 recipes per week and will be creating specials in the restaurant based on what I learned.

I begin April 1st. I am excited, challenged and hopeful. I’ll keep my progress updated here, disasters and all! Thanks Nora Ephron, Julia Child and Meryl Streep. You’ve been an inspiration.

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No Call No Show

Fri, 16 Dec 2011 14:01:49 -0700

As usual the best (or worst) of my stories starts with a ringing phone. No call no shows are the worst. It’s bad for everyone… My loyal employees, our customers, me, L and Mr. Plum. This weekend was no different. When both of your brunch cooks burn you on the same day no one wins.

6:45 am I get the call:

“We have no cooks. I can’t get ahold of [asshole #1] or [asshole #2].”

I start screaming into the phone, ” OH MY GOD!!!!!! START CALLING EVERYONE ELSE!!!!” My body breaks out in a cold sweat. I’m terrified. I jump out of bed and in my sleepy haze find my chef coat and head to the bathroom. Then it hits me. Pure panic. I can’t do this. I can’t fake brunch. As you may know, I’m kind of an accidental chef. I can rock a dinner service but brunch is a whole different animal. You can’t fake your way thru brunch. ##more##

Brunch takes a certain talent. A respect for the egg and the potato and a certain something that can’t be defined. As I stand there in my underwear, chef coat in one hand, phone in the other I become paralyzed. We are supposed to start service in 10 minutes! We can’t afford to lose today’s business! But I can’t do brunch. I just can’t… Can I? And the shaking sweating and screaming continues as I collapse onto the bathroom floor.

As I sit there writhing in my own panic I run thru all the scenarios. Lines of customers screaming for poached eggs and hollandaise sauce. Me standing in the kitchen trying to flip eggs with a spatula and breaking all the yolks. Burnt toast, soggy bacon, mushy oatmeal. Tears in the fruit salad, swear words on the french toast.

I couldn’t help but wonder what I had done to deserve this treatment. I have been told on numerous occasions that I’m “too nice” to my staff. I have a tendency to treat them too much like friends or my children than my employees. I probably should have seen this coming. I probably should have fired that guy after showing up late the first three times…

I resolve right then to no longer be the Nice Boss Lady. From now on it’s all fire and ice. Two bad seeds have killed the good apple and it’s all serpent from here on out! You’re late, you’re fired! Having a bad day? Get out! Burn the soup? Pack your knives! I’m done!

The phone rings again. And again. I hold my breath as I answer…. My Kitchen Manager (an angel sent from the universe) and last remaining line cook ( a zen kitchen guru ) have arrived. Brunch will only start an hour late. I’m told to go back to bed and not worry. The remaining staff pulled together and made it happen. While I slumped on my bathroom floor in defeat, they stepped up big time and took care of bidness. My bidness…

I’m shocked and relieved beyond words. I hang up the phone, shuffle back to bed and throw the covers over my head. I lay very still while my mind and body process what has happened. They saved my ass… Our ass… Everyones ass. What did I do to deserve this amazing support?

Being the Nice Boss Lady is a double edged sword. Creating a working culture based on respect, understanding and camaraderie can work when the right boundaries are in place and the right people are participating. My challenge is to set those boundaries and stand up for the people that deserve it and let go of the ones that abuse it. The universe helped me clean house this time… Next time it’s up to me.

So, Serpent Boss Lady? Fire and Ice? I don’t think so. Maybe just a little fire in my back pocket in case of emergencies.

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I Love My Work, December 31, 2010

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:37:43 -0700

I am fortunate to be doing what I love. Food rocks. As do wonderful staff and supportive families. ##more##

Happy New Year!

It’s 3:23 a.m.

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:37:24 -0700

It’s the middle of the night and I can’t sleep. Every time I try the parade starts thru my head. $x for this. $x for that. What goes good with that? If I quote x then I will make y. If I can do a+b then I should get c. If I take the square root of blah divided by the whatever then I should be able to find the secret of the universe…

The number of numbers in my life is staggering. And it’s not just the dollars. There are the minutes, hours and days. The years… The wrinkles… The pounds… The weight of hopes and expectations. The disappointments and failures. And they all add up and divide and multiply themselves in my head. ##more##

Unanswered texts and calls become dire. Unlistened to voicemails are ticking time bombs. Conversations that seemed benign become fraught with drama. Should I have said that? Did I say the right thing? The wrong thing? He knew I was kidding right??? No, I don’t think it’s shit… Do I?

None of it’s real of course. It’s all a figment of my overactive mind going crazy while my defenses are down. Of course I’m innocent in all of this… I’m the victim here! The tired and weary victim under attack by the enemy mind…

I imagine sending in the cavalry. White sheep riding in on white horses smelling of lavender and chamomile and other herby hippy feel good stuff. They whisk me up in a cloud of fluffy down and flannel and carry me to the happy sleepy time land where I pleasantly rest for 3 days uninterrupted…

It’s 3:23 a.m. and this is my head. Perhaps it’s time to revisit that whole mediation thing…

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Almost There

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:35:57 -0700

Has everyone seen Disney’s Princess and The Frog? The heroine is Tiana and her dream is not to fall in love and be saved from her poor life by a man. Her dream is to save her life by opening a restaurant. You heard me, opening a restaurant.

L loves this movie. Though she does think that Princesses don’t own restaurants, they dance of course. And I love it because its heroine has a vision for her life other than marrying a prince. And the restaurant arc really resonates with us… You know, on a deep, spiritual level…

The theme song for Tiana is called, Almost There. It’s a jazzy little number and really quite inspiring. ##more##

I’ve had trials & tribulations / you know I’ve had my share… But I’ve climbed a mountain and I’ve crossed a river and I’m almost there… People gonna come from everywhere and I’m almost there…

This encapsulates how I’ve been feeling the last month or so. Fall Menu? Almost there… Website update? Almost there…. Kitchen floors? Almost there… Curtain project? Almost there? Wholesale expansion? Almost there… Steady consistent dinner business? Almost there… Marketing plan? Almost there… The list goes on and on…

I decided a week ago to use this song as my theme song. I gave in and let it run thru my head constantly. It’s my annoying Disney mantra. My goal was to complete 50% of the tasks that are on the verge of completion.

Maybe I should skip to the kiss a frog part now…

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Comfort food

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:34:40 -0700

Cooler weather screams for comfort food! Feed me! Make me happy and round. Fill me with butter and squash and butternut squash. Braise me, bake me and smother me with fat! Keep me warm thru the winter! So much pressure!

As I put the finishing touches on Louisa’s fall menu I find myself making a mental list of the challenges I face in the kitchen. Don’t get me wrong! I can put a great meal together. But as the restaurant owner thrown into the role of chef I accept that I am short on some experience and technique. I try to not let this slow me down. I try to just cook and let it all happen. But there are so many questions! What goes best with x,y,z? How long will this dish take to prepare in the middle of a busy night? Can I trust someone else to make this sauce? Why do you need to hang the meat before slow roasting it? What’s the best way to do this or that? Can I do that with my 6 burners and little flat top? ##more##

The answers? 1) Try it and see. 2) treat your kitchen like your cooking school. 3) keep cooking.

The new fall menu debuts Monday night. Until then I will just keep cooking, listening and eating. I’ll let the comfort food I’m creating lull me to sleep at night. If it can do that then I must be doing something right….

Sauteed Woody and Grilled Fairy Inspiration

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:34:22 -0700

My 3 year old daughter has been building restaurants out of blocks. She carries a notebook sometimes and tells me, “I’m working on my menu”. ##more##

She sautés things. You know, cards, blocks, wooden food… She has lots of awesome ideas. Baked butterflies with sauteed fairies. Sand soup with seashell chips. Tutu salad with grilled Woody. It’s incredible. She’s very talented. She inspires my every move…

Me and David Allen Nirvana

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:34:03 -0700

I have a picture of me and David Allen on my desk. David Allen is THE guru of productivity. He employs a zen, mind like water approach to “Getting Things Done” (which is the title of his book.) If productivity had a religion GTD would be it and David Allen would be the Top Guy.

The theory is that you get all the stuff out of your head and into a trusted system of lists and folders and schedules etc. Then your mind will be free to make the decisions and choices that need to be made about what to do at any given moment in your life. And then you will have achieved productivity Nirvana….

I’ve read the book three times… ##more##

The amount of “stuff” in my head is enormous. People, food, taxes, rent, laundry, mortgage, money, insurance, government, preschool, laundry, inventory, maintenance, curtains, refrigeration repair, schedules, facebooks, tweets, blogs, websites, money, bank accounts, menus, creation, momentum, press, emails, snail mail, voicemails, retail, carpet cleaning, floor chipping, be creative, be successful, be real, wife, mother, restaurant owner…

David Allen came to Louisa’s a few months ago to speak to a group having a private party. I was of course so excited you would think I was going to meet Madonna or Ray Charles or something. I was so excited I couldn’t speak to the man. All I could do was listen. I absorbed every word but there was one bit that really stuck with me. Someone asked what he tells people who say they know his system works but can’t seem to sustain it for very long. His answer? “Grow up!”. Basically he believes that the system is so simple at it’s core that the only excuse for not using it is that you’re lazy. You don’t want to do the hard stuff so you don’t do anything. Hmmm….

Did I mention I’ve tried at least three times?

I long to achieve the mind like water zenny zone work flow David Allen Nirvana. But he’s right. On a certain level I am lazy. It’s all so much. If I take it out of my head and put it on paper or in my fancy ToDo App or wherever, it gets bigger. And might grow fangs that rip into my existence and make big holes I don’t want to see. Right now its all just little idea and task neurons firing in my head.

Bing ping bing… Little neurons waking me up, distracting me from my potential. Bing ping bing… Little neurons distracting me from my daughter… Bing ping bing… They don’t do laundry do they?… Fourth times the charm?

http://www.davidco.com/

Family Fun Day

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:33:41 -0700

Mondays are my one “day off.” We call it Family Fun Day. Between the two restaurants, Mr. Plum’s bidness and everything in between its the one day the three of us get to be together as a family unit.

Today started with hiding from monsters in bed, eating breakfast and then going to L’s first ballet class. It was her first time in the kids only class (no parent participation.) She totally rocked it! I had at least 10 proud mommy moments while watching her thru the one way glass. After class we played on the beach outside the school and then went to Louisa’s for lunch… Always risky and today was no different… One thing led to another and the next thing I knew I was signed up to cook dinner that night solo… That’s what happens when colds and flu’s and vacations get all mixed together. ##more##

Louisa’s dinner service is always unpredictable. One night busy, the next night ghost town. Its a struggle and frustrating and exciting and rewarding all at the same time. Its the one menu that was entirely created by me. No hold overs from the previous chef or owners. All me. Thats where it gets emotional. When you prepare the dishes you have spent so much time creating, thinking about, laboring over, and no one comes to eat them, well, you get the idea. I love the warm, squishy feeling of someone enjoying what we offer. I want that feeling all the time.

So back to Family Fun Day… We get L home and I get her down for her nap. Mr. Plum goes to The Crepe Cafe. He is obsessed with the music and wants to replace the amp. And then there’s the tree. It needs trimming and this is usually his job. So off he goes and I decide to rest before my big night.

Then L wakes up. Upon hearing the news that Mommy is going to work the water works begin. She’s crying and then I realize I’m crying. Family Fun Day has been hijacked by cold/flu season and my little girl is not happy and neither am I. All I can hope for now is that my presence in the restaurant tonight will be needed, that we have business to make it worth missing this evening with my family.

To make a long story short, my shift in the restaurant was a successful one. People came, I cooked for them and they liked it. The best part was L and Mr. Plum coming for dinner too. L pretended to make me ice cream out of her soup. So creative that one! So it all worked out this time. I wish I knew when it was going to work all the time. Wouldn’t that be an accomplishment?

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It Started with a Buzz, Ended with a Fall

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:32:28 -0700

So, I woke up this morning to the horrible buzzing sound of my phone on a pile of change and pocket lint. It’s Sunday. My daughter was sleeping at Grandma’s and I had been up till after 1 a.m. with post closing hyperness. Was really looking forward to a little marathon sleep in time… Not today. Caller id say, “Louisa’s.” I pick up the phone.

“Llama G called and they didn’t get their delivery. The driver has already left for the morning…”

My first thought is, “Why is this my problem?” Oh, I know why. Wholesale customers pay some of my bills. I love my wholesale customers. This is a newer client. What happened? ##more##

Mr. Plum graciously offers to go for me but I decline. I’m up, I’m out and within 5 minutes I have a latte in hand, box of baked goods in the other and I’m on the road. Thru the haze of having been aspleep about 10 minutes earlier I’m feeling pretty good now. Early start to the day, maybe I’ll be able to squeeze in some yoga… I make my delivery and start for home. Then the phone rings again, and again…

Louisa’s: “We’re out of straws. Not a big deal but its hard to serve Bloody Mary’s without them.”

Alcena: “Sure, I’ll pick some up from The Crepe Cafe! Its closer than Cash n Carry!” (I’m so smart to have two restaurants!)

Crepe Cafe: “We don’t have straws either…”

Alcena: “Oh, ok. I’ll get you some too then…” (Whats with the run on straws this week?)

Cash & Carry: Straws obtained! Phone rings…

Crepe Cafe: “Its Shelly… I burned my hand on the stove pretty badly. I need…”

Walgreens: Burn cream, burn pads, gauze, 3 different kinds of pain reliever…

I walk into The Crepe Cafe just after they opened. Almost a full house with the chef debilitated by circular stove element burns on one hand… Now I’m Dr. Alcena! I dress the wound, give instructions about how many Aleve to take and how many Tylenol are allowed. And then I’m a barista… 2 double tall non fat lattes! One hot chocolate, one light chocolate mocha! 1 non fat cappuccino! With them all caught up I’m out the door leaving behind the promise of returning later to try the new brunch specials!

I drop the straws at Louisa’s and head home hoping that was the end of the madness. Mr. Plum is there, he wants to clean house today. I do not. Not at all. So instead we get presentable and go to The Crepe Cafe for brunch. The new specials were delicious! A provencial benedict crepe with a red wine reduction and sweet potatoes. The other was an apple & blueberry crumble with warm creme anglaise. Even with one hand Shelly can make some lovely food! I’m so happy and lucky to have her as our chef!

Things were starting to turn around. I ran some errands and got back to Louisa’s right at 2 o’clock to complete my real project of the day: Finish hanging the window sheers. Its been 3 weeks and many obstacles but I finally have every tool I need and a closed restaurant to work in. I drill, I screw, I tighten and I hang 7 curtains. FINALLY! This project which started with a custom made, big, beautiful, floor to ceiling curtain and was ending with delicate window sheers has lasted months. I felt so accomplished and so happy that this day was ending on a happy note! I even had time to go home and relax a bit before L’s friend comes over. I’m cooking dinner for everyone and still have a full night ahead of me!

I walk in the door to my house. I sit and put my feet up. Take some deep breaths and start to relax. Then I hear the buzzing… Caller id says, “Louisa’s”…

Louisa’s: ”The big curtain just fell out of the ceiling…”

And so it goes…

Llama G Cafe on Yelp

Poetry And Food (huffingtonpost.com)

The Food is Falling… And so is Everything Else

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:30:41 -0700

So I’m standing in the kitchen thinking to myself, “I love Fall foods! I’m going to focus on Fall food in our next newsletter.” And then the title hits me… The Food is Falling! The Food is Falling! I’m feeling quite smart about this. I’m so clever you know? Anyway, I saddle up to my incredibly old but still functioning as long as it’s plugged in laptop and begin to type. Clickity clack go the keys… T..h..e F..o..o..d is F..a..l..l..i..n..g…… Wait… What is fall food? I stop in my tracks… Butternut squash is obvious, but bacon? Not specifically but so yummy with the squash…. Kale? Not really but it’s so yummy with the bacon… Brussel sprouts? When the hell are they in season? They go really good with the bacon and the squash… Wikipedia doesn’t know. Now I’m panicking. What’s wrong with this picture little Miss I Love Fall Food? Who on earth do you think you are and what are you doing in my kitchen???? All confidence in food has fallen thru the floor… Visions of local, seasonal foodies ridicule flash before my newly minted chefy eyes… This isn’t what I signed up for… Aaaaaaah!!!! ##more##

STOP… Deep Breath… You know how to cook the food, not grow the food and that’s ok right? Calm yourself woman! Learn something for crying out loud… Some more breathing, a full Google search and a perusal thru edibleSEATTLE (at least I have the right magazines around) and I’m back on track…

You see, I’ve only been a “chef” for a month. All by accident and necessity and passion for this life of restaurant ownership. The ownership part born out of my passion for entertaining, cooking and drinking. I love that I have so much to learn right now. It inspires me and pushes me to keep going! It also can be embarassing and frustrating. But that’s all part of the job. If I’m not learning something new, embarassing myself and fighting thru the frustration then I’m getting boring and so is the restaurant.

So, here is a list of some of my “Fall Foods”. I’m stoked to start cooking them, eating them and sharing them! Apples, beets, greens, squash, quince, garlic,leeks, potatoes, corn, carrots, chanterelles, pears, pumpkins, beans and bacon.

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Hello World!!!

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 01:29:26 -0700

Hello all! So, you want to know what owning two restaurants is like huh? Are you sure about that? You ask a lot so I’m guessing you do… Well, stay tuned to this blog and I will reveal it all in good time… xoxo Alcena